Honey Badger Don't Care

Honey Badger Don't Give a Shit.




Okay so I am going to tell yall about a dream I had last night. It was pretty rad and I think I made a new best friend.


This dream was pretty awesome. I was sitting a room, it was almost like a room where we are about to listen to someone talk, my guess was that they were going to talk to us about toothpaste because we were in a convention center for old people.


I look around and who do I see? Lindsey Lohan. I am star struck! The fact that Lindsey and I use the same toothpaste was amazing. This clearly meant that I would be able to pursue a future as a cocaine addict without harming my pearly whites.


As I look around I see Paris Hilton, Carlie Sheen, Antonio Banderas, Raquel Zimmermann, Cuba Gooding Jr., Tom Welling and Kristin Chenoweth.


Quickly I realized this is not the toothpaste convention I had signed up for. I was clearly either in a celebrity rehab center....or on the set of the Rat Race sequel.


When know Doctors came out I took it upon myself to personally rehabilitate each and everyone one of the celebs from whatever ails them. So I said "Okay guys lets gather around and talk about our problem like an AA meeting"


They all start to move there chairs, Mr. Sheen kind of had a hard time following instructions being under the influence from his morning line but Tom Welling, being  superman, helped him get into the circle.


I called Lindsey over to sit by me. She needed the most help and I was very interested in knowing how Herbie Fully Loaded ended, because I fell asleep and am not sure. I assume it wasn't to good because while living in Orlando I'd see Herbie driving all the time and not racing once.


On my right sat Paris, Cuba, Kristin and Tom. Everyone else was on my left. We did role call. By this point I decided they all needed different types of help. Paris, Lindsey and Charlie needed drug rehabilitation. Antonio needed a new face because he is often confused for Rickey Martin by the non-Hispanic community. Cuba needed a jump start to his career and Raquel needed a little bit of name recognition. Tom tired to say he had to problem but I knew I'd find his kryptonite. Kristin really didn't seem to have problems though, really her only problem was that she played an on screen drunk.


Now it looks like I am just beginning to peek in my story and that more is to come but that is where you are wrong. I got a phone call from some number I don't know and it ruined my dream. I debated putting the number up here in hopes that someone would be able to tell me who they are but since it was probably a wrong number I'd hate for crazies to start calling them up every chance yall get.


but you know what


HONEY BADGER DONT CARE






i dont even like honey badgers.


twin.